It never gets any easier. I know I gripe sometimes about how much I miss my dad. And my friends don't understand why I don't give a shit when mother's day rolls around. Though that changed a little bit this year with Suzee. She IS a mom to me...but the day is still non-existent to me. Can't there be a "Greatest Aunt in the World" award? But if I hear one more fucking Father's Day ad I may lose it. I'm a month away from my eighteenth birthday and I can't celebrate Father's Day with my dad. I won't be turning eighteen with my dad. Jessica's been all too loyal during my sulking ... I don't deserve her.
What's making it worse is that my foot just isn't healing fast enough for me. My doctors say I'm healing faster than they expected but when I'm jumpy like this I want to be on the court. Playing the guitar only reminds me of dad. I'm ahead in all the classes I'm taking ... when I can't get on the court or play my guitar, I study. I'm just going crazy.
I just want to get through Father's Day and my birthday.
Fuck.
What's making it worse is that my foot just isn't healing fast enough for me. My doctors say I'm healing faster than they expected but when I'm jumpy like this I want to be on the court. Playing the guitar only reminds me of dad. I'm ahead in all the classes I'm taking ... when I can't get on the court or play my guitar, I study. I'm just going crazy.
I just want to get through Father's Day and my birthday.
Fuck.
- Location:the dorm
- Mood:
depressed - Music:Celtic Frost - Monotheist
